{"id":1000065993,"date":"2026-07-26T02:37:03","date_gmt":"2026-07-26T07:37:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/cinesist.com\/?p=1000065993"},"modified":"2026-07-26T04:21:56","modified_gmt":"2026-07-26T09:21:56","slug":"naked-gun-2025-review","status":"publish","type":"cinesist-review","link":"https:\/\/cinesist.com\/uncategorized\/naked-gun-2025-review\/","title":{"rendered":"The Naked Gun: A Crime Against Comedy"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Legacy media was doing backflips back in ’25 trying to convince us this “revival” captured the spirit of the original. They were trying to get us to sip the studio Kool-aid while the rest of us were being forced to pay a Theater Tax for a movie with the comedic timing of a frozen loading screen. This wasn’t a tribute; it was a total system crash.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n
\n
\n
\nTL;DR (The Lowdown)<\/strong><\/span>\n\n\n\n\"Cipher\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n

This is a hollowed-out version of a classic being used to boost “brand engagement.” It fails the basic test of being, you know, funny, despite some heavy-hitter names and weirdly timed cameos trying to save the wreckage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Warning: System Flaws Found<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

The script feels like it was fed through a “Second Screen” algorithm designed to be watched while you\u2019re busy doing anything else. The original Leslie Nielsen masterpieces worked because the world was serious while the characters were idiots; here, the entire world is in on the joke, which completely kills the friction. Every gag is broadcast three minutes before it happens, giving the audience enough time to file their taxes before the punchline lands.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Thesis:<\/strong> <\/h3>\n\n\n\n

The Naked Gun (2025) is a bland, corporate reboot that fails to understand why the original worked, leaving a talented Liam Neeson stranded in a sea of predictable gags and bizarre wrestling cameos.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n
\n
\n

The Naked Gun (2025) Missed The Assignment<\/h3>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n
\n
\n\"A\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n
\n
\n\"A\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n
\n\"Movie\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\ud83e\uddecCinescore DNA<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

\u270d\ufe0fPlot Analysis: Predictable & Lazy<\/strong> <\/h4>\n\n\n\n

The “System Flaws” here are massive. The plot doesn’t just borrow from the original; it lazily photocopies it without understanding the ink. Every joke is telegraphed five minutes before it happens, stripping away the element of surprise that made Leslie Nielsen a legend. By the time the “Not Nordberg” gag lands, you\u2019ve already checked your watch twice. It\u2019s a script written by a committee terrified of taking a real risk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

\ud83e\udd4aThe Liam Neeson Skills: 39 Bad Guys Served<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
\n
\r\n
\r\n
\r\n
\r\n
MVP<\/div>\r\n
<\/div>\r\n \"Liam\r\n

Liam Neeson<\/h3>\r\n <\/div>\r\n\r\n
\r\n
\r\n
\r\n
\r\n Snark<\/span>\r\n 80%<\/span>\r\n <\/div>\r\n
\r\n
<\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n
\r\n
\r\n Authority<\/span>\r\n 38%<\/span>\r\n <\/div>\r\n
\r\n
<\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n
\r\n
\r\n Mojo<\/span>\r\n 85%<\/span>\r\n <\/div>\r\n
\r\n
<\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n
\r\n
\r\n Shield<\/span>\r\n 25%<\/span>\r\n <\/div>\r\n
\r\n
<\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n \r\n \r\n
\r\n FULL INTEL ACCESS<\/a>\r\n <\/div>\r\n <\/div>\r\n<\/div>\r\n <\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n
\n

Liam Neeson<\/a>. He is the undisputed MVP of this disaster, but it\u2019s a tragic victory. Neeson understands the assignment perfectly\u2014he treats every absurd line with the gravity of a kidnapped daughter and a “very particular set of skills<\/mark>.” <\/p>\n\n\n\n

However, even a high-tier operative like Neeson can\u2019t save this movie. While he\u2019s playing it straight, the rest of the cast is mugging for the camera like they\u2019re auditioning for a local car commercial. It creates a tonal “glitch in the matrix” where you\u2019re watching a master at work trapped inside a high-budget TikTok prank.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\n\nPowered by CinesistDB<\/span>\n<\/a>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n

\ud83c\udfadPerformance Payload: Neeson vs. The Extras<\/strong> <\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Liam Neeson is the only operative on the field who remembered he was in a movie. He plays it deadpan, exactly how it should be, but he\u2019s surrounded by a cast that acts like they\u2019re in a 30-second TikTok skit. Cody Rhodes looks like a plastic surgery disaster as the bartender, and the rest of the cast feels like stand-ins who were hired because they were cheap, not because they were funny. It\u2019s an elite actor trapped in a middle-school play.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\udce3Execution: Directed by a Spreadsheet<\/strong> <\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Akiva Schaffer and the producers clearly had a checklist of “Brand Assets” to hit rather than a vision to execute. It feels like every scene was focus-grouped into oblivion until all the personality was scrubbed out. The timing is off because the producers were more worried about the Dave Bautista cameo than the actual rhythm of the scene. It\u2019s direction-by-numbers, and the math doesn’t add up to a laugh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\ud83d\uddbc\ufe0fVisuals & Vibes: The “Eagleman” Aesthetic<\/strong> <\/h4>\n\n\n\n
\n
\n\"Movie\n\n\n\nPoll Time<\/span>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n\t
\n\t\t

Which “Logic Error” ruined your immersion the most, Operative?<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t
\n\t\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t